I wrote Did You Know I Would Miss You? to help other survivors live on and live well after the devastating loss of a loved one to suicide.

I experienced this loss first hand in May of 2004, after police found the body of my 54-year-old brother, Steve, in the cab of his truck in a gravel pit near Kindersley, Saskatchewan.

What followed was a soul storm of grief, guilt, shame, heartbreak, as well as unexpected feelings of joy and wonder. My confusion of feelings found expression in my journal, a lifelong source of solace that has never let me down.

Not having found a book that charts the soul journey of the suicide survivor, I needed to write one. Over the next few years, I drew on my decades as a professional writer and educator, and shaped my journal ramblings into this memoir/self-help journal guidebook.

Did You Know I Would Miss You? traces my journey of transformation from Steve’s grief-stricken sister to his life-affirming ally in a relationship that I describe as “an ongoing connection with someone who has expanded beyond the suffering that informed so much of his life. There is a story to discover here and I trust its wisdom.”

As I say in my Foreword to this new edition, “I have faith that where I have been able to be truthful about my story, you will find your way to yours. I have faith that in our stories we can find wholeness and redemption.”


In Canada

Did You Know I Would Miss You?: The Transformational Journey of the Suicide Survivor

Did You Know I Would Miss You?: The Transformational Journey of the Suicide Survivor: Donaleen Saul: 9780981043814: Books – Amazon.ca

In the US

Did You Know I Would Miss You?: The Transformational Journey of the Suicide Survivor

In May of 2004, the body of Donaleen Saul’s 54-year-old brother, Steve, was found in the cab of his truck in a gravel pit near Kindersley, Saskatchewan. The cause of his death was as unambiguous as its impact: “Despite our fractured and unexplored relationship, or perhaps because of…

“Donaleen’s book is an essential, invaluable addition to our counselling practice libraries and a powerful and profound tool to support our clients’ healing.”

Journal Guide by Donaleen Saul
Tessa Lloyd, RCC, Victoria, BC

Did You Know I Would Miss You? is a safe haven for reflection and conversation, and a practical guide for healing at one’s own pace. Using her own story, Donaleen offers images, questions, and activities to help readers unravel their own story of transformation.”  

Light version of the image of a stack of books
Angela Zawadzki, MA, MFT

“I lost my sister to suicide. Did You Know I Would Miss You? really helped me. One of the many things it gave me was an opportunity to focus on my sister’s whole life, not just the final act.” 

Journal Guide by Donaleen Saul
Jim Stanton, Media Consultant

“Recently, Donaleen facilitated a creative writing workshop at Valley View Funeral Home in Surrey, titled ‘From Heart to Hand.’ All of the women who attended were survivors of loss of a loved one to either suicide or homicide…I have seen firsthand the value that this creativeness can bring to those who are grieving.” 

Light version of the image of a stack of books
Marlyn Ferguson, Arborcare Coordinator

“Donaleen is an unusually engaging public speaker – great natural warmth and humour plus meaningful content.”


Journal Guide by Donaleen Saul
Chris Kelly, Superintendent of Schools (Retired), Vancouver School Board

In this brave and necessary work, Donaleen Saul stares straight into the pain of losing a loved one to suicide…the story is compelling and the journal-writing exercises are sensitive and artful, gently guiding the reader through the complexities of this very particular grief.

Light version of the image of a stack of books
Kathleen Adams, Director, Center for Journal Therapy; Author, The Way of the Journal and Journal to the Self

“Losing a loved one to suicide plunges you into a depth of soul that few others share, and Donaleen Saul wrote her book, Did You Know I Would Miss You? from that place. Indeed when I was reading Did You Know I Would Miss You? I knew I was treading on Holy Ground.”

Books in a fan arrangement,
Donald Grayston, Theologian

Donaleen Saul stands by the sea in BC at sunset
Donaleen Saul

“We do not need to walk this road alone.”

Join me in this journey, sign up for my newsletter, and receive your copy of SEVEN WAYS TO USE YOUR PEN TO HEAL YOUR GRIEF.

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Give a gift to a bereaved loved one by ordering a signed hard copy with a personal message from the author. For details, contact donaleen@donaleensaul.com.